me. right now.

i'm ACLS certified. don't know what that is? well.... stop breathing and tell your heart to stop beating. and if i have the right equipment and drugs nearby i can save your life. but really now, i'm pretty excited about it. just another step closer to getting my RN.

festival of colors was successful. i think i loved it a lot.

my nephew is A.D.O.R.A.B.L.E. i can't get enough of that kid. this weekend he was looking at my dog and laughing his head off every time she would move. it was the best.

so of course that means i'm SO super excited that my sister is having a baby boy!!! the first nephew turned out adorable. and if this new one is anything like camden, he'll be another love of my life. i'm SO excited for lauren and jon!

i spent way too long doing homework today. and i don't have much to show for it. it's getting tiring. i hate pretending to care about assignments. most of them are ridiculously time consuming and pointless. i know that i'm almost done. i've never understood the statement "so close yet so far" as much as i do now.

i passed my comprehensive predictor test. i did well. and it makes me a little bit hopeful about my future.

i finally decided what kind of nurse i want to be. i want to work on the cardiovascular floor at a hospital. i worked there during my preceptorship and i loved learning. i loved knowing the heart rhythms and medications and everything about that floor. my ACLS class solidified my interest and love for anything cardiac. so i'm crossing my fingers that this happens for me someday soon.

i'm happy with life. but i guess i'm not quite as strong as i thought i was. i still allow some things to influence what i do even though i hate it. i still let things bug me even though i'm over them. i still wonder all the time what i could do differently even though i like who i am. when i think i'm over things, something else comes up and the emotions that rise up in me make me wonder if i really am.

i want to go to the beach. it's not one of those, "ah..... that'd be nice to go to the beach" things, it's a "IF I DON'T GO TO THE BEACH IN THE NEAR FUTURE SOMEONE IS GOING TO GET CUT" thing. i'm planning this trip. i'm going to graduate, take and pass the NCLEX and then go to the beach to celebrate my genius. it will happen. IT WILL HAPPEN.

i guess that's life right now.

camping is my boyfriend

Friday morning, after showering, I get a text from house mate Brittni. "We're going to need you to get on messanger." So I pull up gmail, go online, and Britt and Chels start talking to me.
"This is an intervention."
"A spring break/weekend intervention."
It was decided pretty quickly that we needed to do something this weekend. And that something would be camping.
First off, I was so excited I could hardly contain myself. Second, I was so happy to finally be camping in southern Utah since I never have before. Third, I welcomed anything that would give me  yet another excuse to put off writing papers and studying.
Before our adventure started, I met up with Annalie and we took some pictures of each other for our graduation announcements. We kind of just aimlessly walked around campus and said, "Oh hey, take a picture of me doing ....." We're not professionals. But some of the pictures were awesome.

I came home after walking around campus and packed in an excited frenzy. I kept saying "We're going CAMPING! I'm so excited!" Because I was. SO. EXCITED. We filled the car with blankets. Literally. And headed out of town.
We made it to Red Cliffs and were saddened to see the "FULL" sign next to the campground entrance. We drove around a bit and decided to try somewhere else. Chelsey drove us down to Sand Hollow and we pulled up to the entrance and found out that it would either cost us our first born child to camp there or the other campgrounds were closed. So dang.
Chelsey did some quick thinking and called her brother. He knew of a campsite in middle of nowhere aka Hurricane, UT and led Chelsey down some roads until we got to this dirt road that looked like it went on forever.
I think technically we could have camped anywhere, but when we thought about stopping to make camp we felt like somehow we were trespassing.
We all agree that the best part of the trip was when Chelsey all of a sudden took a different road and ended up having to use her four wheel drive to get up some of the steep four-wheeler trails. OH MAN it was so much fun! Like a roller coaster in a Jeep! At one point we were laughing so hard I could hardly catch my breath. Chelsey said, "I'm not sure if it was that safe for the driver to be laughing that hard." We bounced all over the place and had fun times seven. I don't even know how to describe how awesomely exciting it was to off road in her Jeep.
We decided to get off that road and go on the main one again. The sign at the entrance of the dirt road said that there was a Dinosaur track site somewhere and we liked the thought of sleeping near where dinosaurs roamed.
So we finally decided to stop at a spot with some rocks. We felt good about the site because there were a few other campers within eyesight. Our campsite was awesome. We quickly dubbed one of the rock piles the bathroom and then got to work putting up our tent.

Whoever said you need a man when camping should be shot. We rocked that tent.

We made our bed for the night. Two cushiony layers, a sleeping bag, and 9 layers of blankets. We were NOT going to freeze to death.

We played a game in that tent and then decided to make a fire. We picked a pretty great spot for the fire. And within minutes it was a blazing success. Camping tradition dictated that we roast bratwersts over the fire. I think my favorite part of that was being able to call it a "Werst" all night.

"Hmmm.... This werst is best!"
Another favorite part is that I burned mine within the first 2 minutes of cooking it. Ah well. At least mine was cooked all the way through. Chelsey got a little surprise from the pink meat fairy. We're praying she doesn't get any pork worms in her brain. Anyone who would like to add their own prayers may do so. Thanks.
We roasted marshmallows and starbursts. It was pointed out that I'm not patient when it comes to cooking food over a fire. Who cares. I loved my burnt marshmallows and that burn I got from the starburst was worth it.

We went back into the tent after I watched Brittni and Chelsey stomp out the fire like a man. We played the rest of our game. I lost. So yeah, I was angry. Haha.

We took a bathroom trip in the full moon.
And then got underneath our blanket straight jacket and went to sleep.
In the middle of the night I woke up to the sound of coyotes howling. At first my sleepy brain thought it was really cool. But then my sleep imagination ran wild with the thought of coyotes being nearby. I first thought, "I need to remember to ask Britt and Ches if they heard the werewolves." Then I thought, "Coyotes are like werewolves, right?" Then I thought, "No, they're a different species." My brain then went through every thing I might possibly know about coyotes. In Arizona there were coyotes in the desert behind our house and they ate our cat and one of our puppies.
Then I imagined about six coyotes howling at the full moon and then running towards our campsite. They run fast. I sat there in my blankets getting scared to death. I could swear that I heard one sniff outside of our tent, and I thought for sure that they were going to attack. But then I reminded my brain how silly I was and imagined the coyotes far away, snacking on puppies in the full moon light.

I woke up and Britt and Chels were awake too. I told them the story of the werewolves. Oh, we laughed.
It was windy. So we packed up, ate muffins in the car, and then went to see the dinosaur tracks.

We were all "t-rexing" above one of the foot prints.

Our next adventure was a little bit more of the off-roading. Yeah! It was a lot of fun bouncing around. But then one of the hills bounced the car around a little TOO much and afterwards Chelsey's car was making some strange noise. We figured out that it made the sound only when she turned left. We ventured down to St. George and after a little shopping we stopped at the dealer and she got her car looked at. They popped a peice in place and viola! Fixed.
Our last adventure was heading home. Chelsey forgot to get gas, and we knew we couldn't make it to Cedar. So we got off and headed to Toquerville.

The end.

Oh. Another favorite part was our soundtrack. Brittni made a cool playlist for us to listen to with such favorites as:
Music is my boyfriend,
Set fire to the rain,
and other favorites from Lykke Li and other awesome girls.

Just a little note.

Just a little note

My hair is blonde. I thought that's what i wanted but I'm having second thoughts. And third. And fourth thoughts.

It's spring break (Whoo!) and I stayed in Cedar for the first time. It's been nice so far besides the long long list of homework that I need to do that constantly haunts me in the back of my mind. But I'm happy I stayed. I sort of wish I was there to help best friend while he's in a sad place, but I'm happy I stayed nonetheless.

Adele's voice is life changing. Brittni showed me her music the other day. I'm pretty sure I'll be purchasing her albums and blasting them all week in my house so I can practice singing beautifully like her.

Happy birthday to Cyann, one of the best friends in the world. I'm really blessed in the friendship department. I'm pretty sure God sent me the best. I don't know how I deserve it, but hey, I'll take it.

I'm so excited for my sister to have a baby. So excited. Mainly because nephew #1 turned out to be the cutest little guy and instant love of my life. I can't wait to have another nephew/niece.

I like telling people stories about my siblings. And then I realize how cool they all are. I'm lucky that my siblings are the wittiest, funniest people alive. We win.

Lately when people ask me about my plans for after school I blow up in an angry rage and usually end up yelling something like, "it's not as easy as you think!" That magical nursing "shortage" was years ago, people. It's not an easy ticket to getting a job. I can't just pick where I want and live happily ever after. And also, I'm praying about what to do next and I still don't have the answers. But I feel a move away from Cedar is inevitable no matter how much I love it here. *sigh*

I wouldn't mind being able to see into the future.

I sat out in the sun on Sunday and Tuesday. Thus beginning my yearly ritual of tempting the fates and seeing how dark my skin can get before my mom freaks out about skin cancer.

I made three pies on Monday for pi day. I'm a domestic goddess. And so I should automatically get a husband for that.

I like teaching gospel doctrine at church a whole lot. My favorite part is over preparing and trying to be an expert on all of the bible stories only to realize that when I actually do teach I never get hard questions or get enough time to teach everything I prepared. Last Sunday I did go five minutes over time but i taught everything I prepared. It was great. Second favorite part is that best friend teaches the same weeks I do so we share ideas.

I'm hating school. My classes are pointless and I feel like I'm getting stupider as the days go because I'm not learning much that relates to nursing. Learning about leadership won't help me remember that the therapeutic level of digoxin in the body is 0.5-2.0ng/dl. (I missed that on a test today...)

All in all I've been really really happy lately. Since I came back from Christmas break I can only remember having 3 days where I wasn't happy. Only 3. Record? Probably. I'm just grateful for the people in my life, for where I'm at, and for where I'm going.

Plus it's hard not to be happy when its Spring break! Whoo!!

A Crazy Thing Called Love

I love my roommates Chelsey and Lynsie. Try to be as great as them.

Also, I, Mindy, am the best ever.

moment of the day

picture this-

snow falling beautifully outside, covering the ground and trees around me. night is gradually falling.

the only sound i can hear is the wind, cold and brutal, howling against my windows.

i grab my pink striped scarf and put on my coat and boots and get into my car.

i drive to the cemetary. i park on the street in the back and get out of my car.

i put my headphones in my ears and play this song on my iPod.

and i have my own little phantom of the opera type moment.

then i get back into my car and leave, like nothing happened.

so........ best moment of the day? creepy thing? weird thing? random thing?

you be the judge.

done

My preceptorship is done.


Did you hear that?

My preceptorship is DONE!
Since the first day of nursing school I had heard about our preceptorship. How we would start off following our nurse and by the end we would have the nurse follow us instead.
I was terrified.
But I did it. All eleven twelve hour shifts. And all from 6pm to 6am. And I didn't fall asleep and/or die driving home in the mornings. (maybe with just a few close calls...)

I learned so much. My nurse was awesome. I can't find any flaws in the way he does things. I honestly think he's one of the most knowledgable nurses I've ever worked with. He's organized and rarely needs reminding about what to do. He was great. It was a pleasure doing his work for him.

I got to do a bunch of things I've never done before. Such as:

Catch a urine sample
Watch a sheath be removed
Find a heart murmur
Change a central line dressing
Put on a five lead heart monitor
Recognize crazy heart rhythms like A flutter and A fib and PVCs.
Order labs and send them out
Give nitro paste and nitro stat
Order medications from pharmacy
Give meds and IV meds without my nurse watching me
Deciding when to hold meds
Call a patients house to get a med list
Give end of shift report
Fill out care plans
Take care of five patients
Put a bandaid on a "wee willy"
Admit a new patient in the middle of the night
Order a stat EKG
Go down to the cafeteria at 1 am in search for lemon pie
Put someone on a bed pan
Sand bag a bleed after a cardiac catheterization
Set the pace on a heart pacer
Badder scan

I did embarrassing and stupid things like:

Erupt water all over a room from an oxygen humidifier
Spill heparin on a patient
Forget to clean an IV port
Get peed on
Use my own stethoscope on a patient with droplet precautions
Forget my patients names
Almost tipped a patient to the ground
Kicked a catheter box
Taking three tries to get an ID band on correctly
Letting IV meds spill on the floor
Forgetting to open the clamp to the IV tubing
Missing an IV stick (although, I did have six people staring at me while I tried. I got nervous.)
Asking a janitor how to get to the cafeteria
Teaching CNAs how to say "crazy" in Korean
Not knowing answers to questions
Taking five minutes to do a simple drug calculation
Forgetting to tie the patient's gown as we walked down the hallway.
Charting the stuff on the wrong patient's chart. (God bless delete keys.)

It was a GREAT experience.

But....

SO GLAD ITS DONE.

this was my hair after waking up after a night of clinicals.

I'm sick of driving to St. George and back 3 times a week and really need a normal sleeping schedule again.

red, pink, hearts, and love

valentine's day. i was determined to make this one better because last year's was the worst.

today i made it best. the way it should be. red, pink, hearts, and love.

red: annalie let me in on her family tradition. her mom would take string and put it all over the house. in rooms, out rooms, in things, under things. at the end of the string would be a present. so this morning i got up early and went over to annalie's house and we made a string mess of her house. she has 6 roommates. so by the time we were done making 6 different lines all around her house, it was a mess! but a LOVELY mess! she came over to my house and helped me make string treasure hunt awesomeness for my roommates too. it was a BLAST to do! and SO much fun to see them follow their string to their present. this is DEFINITELY going to be a tradition for me.



the pictures don't do it justice.



it was way more awesome than this.



pink: i had my favorite four year old come over to my house today. she kept telling me over and over again that her favorite color was pink. we pretended there were snakes in my kitchen, chased the bunny, watched "depectable me" and played hi-ho cherry oh. we even went on a walk and got to hide from people. my favorite part is when she says, "luigi, I love you." How could anyone not feel loved when she's around?

hearts: we cut out a bunch of paper hearts yesterday in preparation of this blessed day. then we heart attacked a couple people's houses. it was fun to tape hearts to their doors. it reminded me of my mission days. especially the part where we were caught. hehehe. sharing the love is fun.
love: i just love so many people in my life. i've got the best family anyone could ask for. seriously, y'all should be jealous. i've got some of the best friends up north. and right here in cedar i have the best. i'm so lucky to have such great people around me that make my life happy happy all the time. i couldn't ask for anything more.

i think that's what valentine's day is about. recognizing the love you have in your life and showing it to others without fear of being rejected. it's valentine's day for goodness sake! everyone wants a little loving.

love you all! thanks for making it best.