The sibs

This weekend/week has been great.
Because I have the best siblings in the universe. 5 of my best friends in the world.

I got to play at davy's with him and Camden. Video games, flooring his house, going to di, cafe rio, skyping natalie, listening to weird pod casts. So fun.

My whole family (minus mom, natalie, and Ryan) went to the rodeo. I got to sit by Kevin. He's hilarious. I loved when the yellow cowgirl came out and he yelled, "hey banana!!" or when he saw the purple cowgirl and yelled, "grimace!" hahaha....

I beat Jon at Chinese checkers. Of course, he won twice playing skip-Bo. Darn him. He's so funny.

Lowy and I made a pillow case for her pillow. Then we watched a show where they made cookies. So we had not make cookie dough. But she was out of sugar. So we went shopping. She made some delicious cookie dough! Yum! Happy birthday on Sunday too! 21!? Again?!? Haha....

Can't leave Ryan out. Every Sunday at church i write him a letter while I'm sitting in sacrament meeting. Haha. He almost got shot last week. Ha. And he pukes at least twice a week. I miss him.

Connor is a funny kid. We watch phineas and ferb. I took him to di. And I had him come to davy's today for a while and told I'm to stay. They have been playing video games for about 8 hours now. Ha. We have also been fighting all week about who has to have the dog sleep with them. He helped me make lowy's cake.

Good times. Love it.

a week

hung out with mom and sister.
beat jon at settler's of catan.
i applied for 5 jobs in one day. got a headache.
was surprized with a present and awesome cake for becoming a nurse.
made a pie.
had snuggle time with brittni.
rode my bike to annalie's.
did tae bo.
and zumba.
went camping! at red cliffs.
skipped a rock 7 times.
balanced a spoon on my nose.
got depressed while playing the game of life.
got maybe 4 hours of sleep while camping.
jumped off a rock into some water.
hiked.
forgave.
took a deep nap. so deep i forgot where and who i was when i woke up.
bought boy shorts at walmart.
went grocery shopping.
cleaned my closet.
drove to manti.
watched the manti pageant with brother and sister-in-law and the world's cutest nephew.
drove home by myself in the middle of the night.
our house was deemed "unsafe" due to carbon monoxide. no more gas for us.
witnessed truly bipolar weather.
made dinner.
got addicted to "private practice."

i liked this week.

brain thoughts

I'm an RN!!!

I don't think I'll ever tire of saying that. I'm so excited that I accomplished this.

Now I get to figure out life. You know, beg for jobs, figure out where I should live, and see what life's next adventures will bring. It's been confusing. Part of me has an idea of this great life that I can start soon. I get excited about it and plan for it and feel good about it. But then I have a second thought and a whole other plan creeps up and takes hold. Then I plan and fantasize and think. And it happens again. I wish I could see the future.

I'm really glad I got to go to the temple on Saturday. It was needed. I don't know how else to put it. I've been having some sad days lately. Sometimes I need the temple to help me get the sad out and sort through my feelings and thoughts so I can breathe again. Maybe it is terrible of me, but I could hardly pay attention. My thoughts were racing and piling up so quickly that I had to sort through them while I was there. It took all that I had in me not to freak out about the amount of thoughts and emotions that were going through my head. This makes me sound weird. But I am. I don't think I figured anything out 100%. But I came to understand a few things that I should probably do. Ugh........ I'm SO vague. Let's just say life isn't totally happy yet, but I have a few ideas on how to make it a little bit brighter.

Ever since I bought my "boat" I have dreams about going out to some lake somewhere and just rowing across for hours. Seriously. I'll just row and row to the sound of the breeze and birds. I'm alone. And it's so peaceful. I don't think I've been this excited about something I've purchased in a long long time.

I went to Lagoon with Annalie's family and my brother Connor on Friday. I really liked it. And really liked hanging out with my little brother. He reminds me so much of Ryan when he was younger. And I love hanging out with Ryan. So it was a lot of fun. It made me miss Ryan.

I added a list on the side bar of my blog. It's my summer to do list. I figure if I write it down and tell people about it then they can remind me to work on it. Especially all those goals that involve running. I really did get to a point once where I liked it a lot. Then that point faded and was replaced with loathing again. Anyway, these goals will happen. I'm sure of it.

I listened to all of my brother Davy's podcasts. It's called desert bears. Find it on itunes. Him and his friends are hilarious. I think they talk about nerdy things but some of them are really funny. It just reminds me of the fact that I have 4 of the most hilarious, awesome, and cool brothers in the world. Oh. Make that 5. Because my brother-in-law is awesome too.

Today in church a lady who was my young woman leader back when I was 14 commented on how well I have grown up. She said, "If only we knew then where your life would have taken you now, you would have been so excited!" I just kept thinking about that. And I really think I would have been excited. I'm really glad I'm not the same person I was in high school. My sister and I talked about that yesterday. We're totally different. And so much better. Like an upgraded version of myself. What a relief to know that I don't have to be the same. Sometimes change is the best thing.

I guess that's about it. I'm pretty sure all my blog posts are lame for those of you who actually read them. I really find these posts when I can just spew out my brain thoughts to be therapeutic. So... you can bet there will be more. My apologies.

memorial weekend

i'm a triathlete. it's a true story. the swimming was easy. the biking killed my butt. and the 5k was a 5k. i liked it. and it is possible that i'll want to do it again.

i bought a boat. not a boat, boat. but an inflatable raft. but it's not a raft raft. it's a boat. so yeah. it's awesome. i took it out on the lake with my little brother over the weekend. and we had lots of fun riding around. yesterday i took it to a pool and had lots of fun in the deep end rowing in circles. lily loved it. i did too. best purchase ever. i can't wait to take it all over the place.

i went to sarah's ward on sunday. her relief society was normal. i mean, normal. there was no "good news minute" or "miralce moment" or "point fingers at the less active members moment." and it didn't take them 40 minutes to get started. they started within the first ten minutes. i think my jaw was on the floor the whole time. it was a miracle. maybe i'll have to share that this week at my ward's "miracle moment."

sarah made me korean food on sunday. we ate kimchi chigae. and it was fantastic. so was our conversation. she's great. she helps me remember that not all of my friends are jerks. only one is.

i really love having family dinners. on memorial day my siblings all came over and we grilled up some steaks. kevin's steaks were fantastic. and making baby camden laugh was our favorite activity. we're just the coolest group of people. i think everyone should be jealous of my family.

the weather needs to be warmer. sometimes it's warm. but sometimes it's not. looking outside today it tells a windy, cold, sad kind of story. my skin deserves better. so i think i'll go to st. george again today.

oh. i am studying for the nclex. it's next week. i haven't gotten sick with nervousness yet. i probably should. but i'm studying. no worries.